grumpysalmon:

excuse me while I go have sex with people *mimes walking down the stairs behind my couch*

50c:

50c:

And my dick so hard it make the metal detector go off

dick is so hard (it has so much blood in it), that the iron content is strong enough to make the metal detector go off.

lpfan9976:

croatoanhero:

Harley is a gift from God.

This is why Harley is like my all time favorite!

highalia:

you said I was gonna be a mermaid

highalia:

you said I was gonna be a mermaid

patricksdiehard:


this makes me laugh so hard 

patricksdiehard:

this makes me laugh so hard 

My Least Favorite Trope (and this post will include spoilers for The Lego Movie, Guardians of the Galaxy, The Matrix, Western Civilization, and—cod help me—Bulletproof Monk*.) is the thing where there’s an awesome, smart, wonderful, powerful female character who by all rights ought to be the Chosen One and the hero of the movie, who is tasked with taking care of some generally ineffectual male character who is, for reasons of wish fulfillment, actually the person the film focuses on. She mentors him, she teaches him, and she inevitably becomes his girlfriend… and he gets the job she wanted: he gets to be the Chosen One even though she’s obviously far more qualified. And all he has to do to get it and deserve it is Man Up and Take Responsibility.

And that’s it. Every god-damned time. The mere fact of naming the films above and naming the trope gives away the entire plot and character arc of every single movie.

Elizabeth Bear - My Least Favorite Trope (via feministquotes)
Small Bug Kaoani